Style
by Toblerone3
Summary: Ten little snippets per chapter, each centric around a different character or characters from Bleach, with light romantic undertones in some chapters. Chapter 3: Aizen's crew of malicious intent
1. Chapter 1

_It's been away ridiculously long time and I'm very sorry. Anyway, I didn't feel like writing a whole any-kind-of-story so I'm gonna bull shit my way around it by giving you a series of...sentences. I know, what a let down but I hope you get a kick out of them anyway. If you like them, maybe I'll continue with different themes. _

_This one is Ichigo and Rukia._

* * *

_-Tobi _

**1) Joke**

"So, Ichigo," Ishida sighed as she looked at his injured friend "What have you learned?"

"Shut up, Uryuu, how was I supposed to know she was joking when she asked how many of her it would take to screw in a light bulb."

"Still, you didn't have to answer so honestly."

**2) Sketch**

"What are you doing, Ichigo?" Rukia asked the boy who had been scribbling in some kind of book for the past few minutes.

He blushed lightly and sharply replies with a "None of your business, shorty."

She scowls and wrenches the book away from him. Ignoring his complaints she stares at the apparent drawing for a moment, scoffs and hits him with the book. That boy was a pot calling the kettle black.

**3) Cook**

She was asked by Yuzu if she needed help, but Rukia declined. It would be a good blow to her pride if she accepted. After all, she killed hollows for a living, how hard could baking a birthday cake be, especially for _that_ scowling idiot.

**4) Grasp**

The fear gripped her tightly. She would have to go back to her world one day. He would stay in his. They would be separated and when he finally died and came to her world there was no guarantee that they would find each other again. Would he want to find her? Rukia was brought out of her thoughts by a hand, reaching out to her.

"Rukia, We're going home. I don't know about you, but I plan to go together."

She took the hand.

**5) Jump**

Seven year old Rukia liked to play with the neighborhood girls.

"A...B...C...D...E...F...G...H...I! Ah! Rukia-Chan messed up! She's gonna get married to a guy whose name starts with 'I'! Hahaha! Who wants to do double dutch now?"

**6) Clock**

No matter how many times he offered to buy her an alarm clock she insisted she liked hers just fine. He went on to tell her he was a human being, not an inanimate object.

**7) Outing**

When she declined the offers made to her by the various boys at school, Ichigo asked her one day, why. She answered very bluntly and with little more explanation than a flip of her hair and the simple comment "I'd rather stay home."

**8) Cry**

When, in the middle of that Sunday afternoon, the gray sky finally let loose it's tears, they both debated whether or not to join it. At separate instances they glanced at each other and decided they would rather laugh.

**9) Share**

"Oi! Rukia! Aren't those MY strawberries?!"

"Sheesh, Ichigo, keep your pants on. I saved you some downstairs in the fridge."

He grumbled all the way to the kitchen and opened the door to the fridge. Inside, he found the usual things except for the one strawberry on a plate with a scowling face drawn on it with black marker.

**10) Hug**

He had stared at her this morning. She had looked at him like he was nuts.

"What do you want?"

"You look weird."

"Charming."

"Not like that."

"Like what then?"

When he didn't answer her eyes softened and her gaze fell to her lap.

"Is it that obvious...my mood, that is?"

He pulled her to his chest and she felt glad for the first time that morning.

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_Wow. I wasn't expecting that to turn out so...decent. I hope you liked it too. We'll see if I want to continue it. Here's your warning though, I don't expect to be updating regularly so next time I may update in a few days or a few months, which is a pretty sorry excuse for this kind of "story" but I suppose we'll all have to put up with my flaky attitude. I apologize in advance._

_-Tobi_


	2. Chapter 2

_So, uh, yeah. Hi Again. I don't suppose you all want to read about me blathering on about nothing in particular so, here._

_This one is the 11th crew and their shenanigans._

_Enjoy_

* * *

_-Tobi_

**1) Garden**

"What is she doing?" Ikkaku asked Yumichika, watching Yachiru sort jelly beans in the grass.

"I believe you should be asking 'what are they doing'" The man answered as Zaraki came out of a shed with two trowels and a watering can.

"Okay, I'll bite. What are _they_ doing?" he asked again.

"Kuchiki-taicho told Yachiru that planting candy will result in candy trees."

The bald man scoffed, "As if that would work."

A few minutes later, the two went off to buy sour keys.

**2) Teach**

"But by this time the hundred years had just passed, and the day had come when Briar-rose was to a-a-"

"Awake."

"Right, awake again. When the King's son came near to the thorn-hediguh, it-"

"It's pronounced '_Hedge_'."

"Shut up! I knew that!"

"Geez, Ken-chan, you're so bad at bedtime stories! Maybe _I_ should read it."

**3) Make-up**

Ikkaku has had some weird days. He couldn't say this was the weirdest but the way people had been looking at him had been pissing him off all day. He'd already sent three people to the fourth division geeks and more than he remembered had run away after one glare. Yumichika looked at the man with a mixture of amusement and disgust.

"You're pretty bold with fashion, but I must say that look doesn't work for you at all."

"What do you mean?"

A look of understanding dawned on Yumi's face, "Looks like Yachiru's been taking advantage of your naps again. You really shouldn't have let her see where you keep your eye paint."

**4) Dance**

You were never bored at the 11th division, that's for sure. However there are just some stories about your day that you shouldn't tell anyone. _Ever._ And as Makizō Aramaki, otherwise known as Maki-Maki, closed the door to the 11th headquarters he decided seeing his captain, lieutenant, third and fifth seats doing the hokie-pokie was one of those stories.

**5) Card**

The 11th division didn't celebrate birthdays. It wasn't because they were too masculine for birthdays, it's just they hadn't been able to set foot in a shopping center since what has been referred to as the Hallmark incident.

**6) Parade**

For a small amount of time, Kenpachi and Yachiru went to the human world to visit Ikkaku and Yumi. When they got there they caught wind of something called the Grape and Wine festival. After talking it over calmly with Yumi and Ikkaku _'Wine? Hell yeah!'_ they decided to go. The next day they went. Seven hours, 6 aspirin and 24 'Hello Kitty' Band-aids later, the men decided that taking Yachiru to another one of those was going to be the job of some unsuspecting underling.

**7) Polyester**

"Yumichika? Worst. Idea. EVER."

**8) Photo**

"Zaraki-taicho! Your late!" scolded Yamamoto.

"Yeah, and what happened to you guys anyway? You look like you were attacked by a birthday cake."

"Shut up, Soifon. It was Yachiru." Zaraki replied, clearly irritated.

" She looks fine, aside from the icing all over her." said Kyoraku.

"Yachiru! How in the devil did you get it on your back?!" cried Zaraki.

"Can we just take the picture now." Hitsugaya huffed, "We've been waiting to take this captain and lieutenant photo for two hours and... Zaraki-taicho there's a cup cake on your ass."

**9) Bubble**

"Taicho, there's apparently some really strong new guy that's challenging people!"

A second later Zaraki was pushing his way through a crowd of people, a smile wide on his face. Until he got to the clearing to find Ikkaku standing on top of some burly man and his sword covered with blood.

Zaraki stayed in his room the rest of the day.

**10) Chair**

Ikkaku threw yet another unconscious body onto the pile behind the division desk.

"Damn, that oak is strong."

"Ugh, I know. At this rate we'll never break it."

"Not on my watch." a voice said.

Not a second later a dead bear was thrown onto the pile and it collapsed with wood and blood everywhere.

Kenpachi wiped his brow, "Now we can _finally_ get that recliner we've been wanting for so long."

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_Er, yeah. There wasn't really anything other than humor in this. I think my favorite was **Polyester**. Oh, Yumi._

_-Tobi_


	3. Chapter 3

_Because it's never too much fun to make fun of the cold hearted villains. _

_As you may have guessed, this one is Aizen's crew. _

* * *

_-Tobi_

**1) Internet**

"Whatcha ya doin', Aizen-sama?" Gin asked as he watched the former captain type on a computer.

"I'm in the midst of my latest plot to bring down the prowess of Soul Society's personnel."

"Your hackin' their systems?" the fox faced man guessed.

"Worse," Aizen cackled, "I'm stealing from Yamamoto's Deviantart account!"

**2) Shop**

"It appears," Tousen said at the latest espada meeting, "that the morale boosting eating contest we held last week has put us beyond our budgetary limit, Aizen-sama."

"Again?" Aizen sighed, "Oh well. Time to break out the old gear, boys."

---

Ichigo told Rukia to find them a spot as Ichigo walked up to the counter, only to see a familiar face.

"Welcome to Wendy's, can I take your order?"

"....U-Ulquiorra?"

"....If you don't tell, I won't."

**3) Book**

"Are ya okay, Tousen?" Gin asked one day as he watched the blind man expertly type various words on a laptop only to quickly delete them a moment later.

"You know how I was writing that book?" Tousen said.

"Nope."

"Well I finished and now I'm trying to figure out a pen name for it."

"Yeah?"

"Yes. I'm certain if I pick a cool pen name, like Pink Rambo, my book would really sell."

"And _I'm_ certain if ya call yaself Pink Rambo I would laugh maself into a coma."

**4) Wardrobe**

As his superior turned in front of him, doing those odd poses in a newly fashioned robe, for once he had nothing to say.

Tousen turned to him, "Hey, Grimmjow, does this make my but look big? I can't tell."

**5) Sticker**

"Hey, Ichimaru, pass me the rainbow ones." said Grimmjow said, sniggering as he placed the last of the Hamtarou fuzzy stickers on Aizen's sleeping face.

"Crap, I'm out of those Disney Princess ones." complained Nnoitra.

"Shut up, whiner. Now pass me the sparkly teddy bears." Barragan commanded.

And when Aizen woke up, he'd kill them all.

Grimmjow frowned when he realized this, "Don't just stand there, Ulquiorra, break all the mirrors!"

**6) Fight**

"There ya are, Aizen-sama!" Gin cried angrily, "Now get up and get in there!"

"Hell no! Gin, I swear, if you don't get that _thing_ away from me, I WILL END YOU!" Aizen shouted from behind a chair, wielding a candle stick.

"Aizen-sama! It's a bar of soap! Ya haven't bathed in who knows how long! Ya smell terrible so _get in that tub and don't come out 'til ya smell like _**_VANILLA AND CUCUMBER!_**"

**7) Generic**

"I'll become the new God of this world." Aizen said to the onlooking Soul Society members.

Too quiet for anyone else to hear, Gin whispered "Looks like Aizen's been readin' Death Note again."

**8) Banned**

"Did you bring it?" Aizen asked, looking agitated.

"U-um, w-w-well...A-Aizen-sama..." D-roy stammered uncharacteristically.

"_Did you bring the stuff!?_" Aizen shouted and D-roy screamed tossing the brown bag he was carrying to the floor, it's contents spilled. Aizen sifted through the pile on the floor only to be unable to find the item he was searching for. He threw his hands up in frustration, jumped up and tried to strangle D-roy. D-roy fainted as Aizen shook him by the collar, "**_WHERE IS IT!?_**"

"That's enough, Aizen-sama!"

Aizen turned to find Gin standing at the door way.

"Gin?! What do you want?!" the crazed man shouted.

Gin sighed, "We didn't want to tell ya, Aizen-sama, but I'm afraid ya've left us no choice."

"What are you talking about, you fool!?"

Gin Bent down and whispered something to Aizen that made the man jump up in sorrow.

"What do you mean they took my precious bacon pocky off the shelves!?"

**9) Nurse**

**"**Now," Aizen said as he organized papers during an espada meeting, "In regards to Ulquiorra's suggestion of a moon bounce in the espada lounge, I- OUCH! Fudge, a paper cut! Tousen, go find the band-aids!"

Gin, not missing the chance, shouted to the blind man, "And while your at it, that lil' nurse's hat, too!"

**10) Oblivious**

'_Oh, mama, this _**_never _**_gets old.'_ Gin thought as he watched Tousen walk down the hall as the fox faced man tried to stifle giggles. Tousen, having heard him anyway, turned to the man.

"What's so funny, Gin?" he asked.

"Oh," Gin said as he turned a laugh into a cough, "Nothing."

Tousen, clearly confused, decided to leave the odd man to his own devices, not wanting to know anymore.

Tousen never did realize that he that Gin had dyed his clothes pink and embroidered them with lace. Again.

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_There you go. Fun with evil._

_-Tobi _


End file.
